Last month, our son decided that he wants to play soccer. Ok, cool, not a problem. I can learn the game of soccer! But, let me just say right here, that he has NEVER played soccer before in his life, except maybe on the playground at school! LOL!
I said ok, and he immediately rushes off to begin researching soccer cleats…as in how much, where to buy them, what color, etc…totally committed. He was looking on any “dot-com” (that is what he calls a website) he could google that would have cleats. This kid went so far as to look up what SIZE he would wear in different brands! Who does that?!
So, all this week he has been asking me when can we go get his cleats. This weekend is “tryouts” and I am guessing he will most likely need a pair. (I have no idea how this works!)
Last night, he came to me all excited! He had just seen a commercial for a few local stores advertising soccer cleats for some pretty reasonable prices. My son is 11, so he does know enough about what is going on in our household at the moment (like a leaky a/c and ruined carpet), to know that we HAVE to shop around for the absolute best deal. I was so proud!
Like I said, he was excited. He grabbed some paper and a marker and made me a sign with ALL of the information that he had just seen on this commercial so I wouldn’t forget the names of the stores. Unfortunately, by the time he brought me the sign, he had already asked about going to these places multiply times and I was beginning to get frustrated. I took the sign and told him thank you but we just weren’t going shopping right now. His face showed obvious signs of disappointment but he didn’t say anything, just walked off.
This morning, however, was a different story.
The sign he made me last night got thrown away, so he made another one. No big deal. I assure you, my child remembered every detail from that commercial.
I spent most of today calling multiple air conditioning repair places. This just caused me to become frustrated and overwhelmed again…too much information and prices that in no way I can afford. Throughout the day I found myself asking God, “When are you going to provide?? When is this season going to be OVER??” and of course so many other questions.
This is when my child decided to come ask me ONE MORE TIME.
“Mom, when are we going to get my cleats?”
BAM. That was my limit.
I spun around and looked at my son and told him, “Listen! I KNOW that you need cleats. You don’t have to keep asking me over and over and over! I heard you the first time…I know what you need and when you need it…you just need to be patient and let me do what I need to do. I promise I will take care of you!”
Ya’ll, the words weren’t even out of my mouth the whole way when IMMEDIATELY, the Lord spoke to my heart THE EXACT SAME THING.
“I heard you the first time. You don’t have to keep asking me.”
Immediately I stopped talking. My mouth just snapped shut and all I could do was stare at my son, ashamed and embarrassed.
My face, tone of voice and body language all softened at the same time, and I looked at him and assured him that he would have what he needed, when he needed it.
What am I supposed to say after that?! I felt like the worst mom ever!! For the past week, my son has been asking for his cleats and when were we going to go get them. For the past week, I have been telling my son, not to worry because God will provide. For the past week, my kid has been watching and listening to ME, worry and ask my Heavenly Father the same questions…how, why, when, where…
So many times in my parenting, I have said or pointed out something to my kids and felt the Lord show me the exact same thing in my own life. I am finding that oftentimes what I am trying to teach MY kids, the Lord is trying to teach ME. The love I have for my two children doesn’t even come close to the love my Heavenly Father has for me…so if I am telling my two kiddos to just be patient, that I know what they need, then how much more do I need to take my own advice and trust Jesus in all areas of my own life?
Talk about a heart check and a teaching moment…